Selfish
by Nevar12
Summary: Johnny pays a drunken visit to Alicias apartment three months after Ben dissapears.


Johnny froze as he felt the tips of warm fingers trail over the side of his face. He was sure Alicia could feel the urgency building beneath his skin but didn't acknowledge it. "What are you doing here Johnny"? The man shuddered at her words. When had her voice come to hold so much power over him? "I wanted to check on you...to see if your alright". The two of them stood in the center of her small apartments and although there was not a clock to be seen both knew it was late. "I'm fine" she assured him. "You should go home and get some rest".

Johnny had come in unannounced but despite her blindness Alicia had not been surprised when she felt him standing a few feet away from her. He was drunk. Could barely even keep himself in the sky that night but the drinks in his system were just the boost he needed to lead him there. He wasn't his usual cocky self, this was no time to be it. Anyone who knew him knew that wasn't the real him and other than Susan she had been the only one who did.

It wasn't just about sex although Johnny would be lying if he said he didn't want to fuck her. Once he had walked in on her taking a shower in Ben's room and to that day could not get his mind off of it. Needless to say his hand had gotten more than a work out that month. She wasn't like the other girls that had taken an interest in. They flocked to him like moths to a flame (no pun intended) but none of them were interested in HIM. None of them knew HIM not like she did. "You ok" he asked.

Moving her hands to hold her shoulders the woman nodded. It had been over three months since Ben had left. No explanation, no clues, just a note that had said "I'll be back". "Its late" she whispered. "Go home". She moved to leave but he put out his arm blocking her. Running his nose over the side of her neck he sighed. She wasn't sure how to respond to his actions. "You didn't answer my question" he said.

Before he could stop himself Johnny kissed Alicia hard taking her shocked gasp as an opportunity to thrust his tongue inside. She tasted sweet. A mix of fresh strawberries and dew. The woman gasped as he ground his need against her mound. "Johnny I..." her words cut off. Rather than stop he continued his oral exploration of her trailing kisses down the side of her neck and collarbone. She said his name again but he wasn't sure how she meant it, as a plea for or against his actions.

Moving a free hand down the side of her silk clad leg he pushed up the smooth material of her thin nightgown. Her skin was smooth and warm the heat of her center calling to him as his own hot fingers trailed toward them. What he was doing was probably wrong but he could not bring himself to stop not when it had taken him months to get this close. Sliding his hand between the woman's legs he ran a finger over the center of her mound. "I want you" he whispered. The man was already hard the evidence of his need straining against his pants.

He moved to kiss her again but she turned away. "Ben" she whispered. Johnny sucked his teeth at the mention of the things name. He had watched her with him over the past year. Beauty and the beast he had called them. The walking rock pile didn't deserve Alicia. It was no mystery they had never had sex and yet she never showed any frustration over it. She had been patient with him, more patient then Ben had earned. She even felt the need to wait for him when he disappeared. Johnny snorted. And they called him selfish.

"He's gone" Johnny responded. His voice sounded more bitter than he had intended it to be but he was in no mood to hear about Ben. "Damn it Alicia" he shouted. "Your driving me crazy" he shouted. "I want you, you cant tell me you've never felt anything for me". The woman was silent. "I love him" she whispered. "Too bad he doesn't love you" Johnny hissed. He knew he had hurt her but hadn't she hurt him? Walking forward he crossed his arms looking into the woman's directionless eyes. God she was beautiful. He half expected her to fight him, tell him how he was wrong but she did neither. Walking forward she sought out his arm moving to kiss the side of his face. "Go home Johnny" she whispered.

He would go. Not because he wanted to but because she wanted him to. As much as he wanted her he also wanted her to want him and for that he would wait.


End file.
